Made in China

This is not a rant about buying American. This is about my babyyyy! And she could wake up any moment, so I better get right to it.

First, I do not recommend giving birth in China. Unless you have an amazing insurance package that covers international hospitals or you are fluent in medical Chinese, just don't do it.

I have good connections, a necessity in China. The mother of one of the boys I tutored set me up with the director of the OBGyn department at Beijing Hospital. I didn't stand in lines, and I could call my doctor's cell with any questions or concerns. We went out to dinner a few times. We were tight. And she made promises. Important ones. I was to have an epidural, a luxury that usually only hospital staff receive. My husband was to be allowed in the delivery room; Chinese women give birth alone. I was only to have an episiotomy if the baby was in danger. I was to hold my baby for 30 minutes after delivery before she got wisked away.

BUT I delivered 10 days early, and my doctor was out of town. So I did not get an epidural, my husband was not allowed in the delivery room, I was given an episiotomy (with absolutely no pain medication), and I did not even get to glance at my baby in the delivery room. My only instructions during delivery were, "Push like take shit" in strongly accented Chinglish. It's funny now, but it wasn't then. Doctors and nurses kept shoving pieces of dark chocolate in my mouth. Granted, I was starving and exhausted, but I kept spitting and barfing chocolate.

Once I was sewn up (still no pain meds), they (I use the pronoun without an antecedent because I have no idea who "they" were) wheeled me into my room, and my baby got wheeled in shortly thereafter. Yay! I will save the delighted mommy stories for a happier post.

I was in the hospital for 4 miserable days. Chinese tradition dictates new moms and babies must stay warm, avoid wind, not eat fruit, and a bunch of other uncomfortable crap. The baby and I roasted. When I ventured out into the hallway toward an open window, nurses, other new moms, visitors, and their cousin's friend's brother's teacher yelled at me. I once opened a window in my room and ate an apple when my "aiyi" was having lunch. She came back just as I was closing the window and had an apple core in my hand. She gave me holy hell.

Enough complaining for now. My baby is healthy and happy. But I will not have a baby in China ever again. I haven't even mentioned the difficulties we went through to get her American citizenship and the fact that the Chinese government doesn't recognize it...

At Jingshan Park when Emaryn was 7 weeks old

At Jingshan Park overlooking the Forbidden City